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You know you are in Qatar when...

... you pay more for drinking water than what you pay for fuel.
... you sweat buckets within 5 mins of standing under the sky in aug - sept.
... you get high quality Sheesha.
... you fail to see a single cloud for like 10 months a year.
... you see or not see the burqa-clad women wherever you turn your head.
... you find most of the retail, banking and other public services snoozing off midday around the year.
... you wake up at 3:30 am to get to the office for a few months.
... you cough up 130 Rs. for like 5 pcs of GolGappe.
... you get a whiff off a butchery shop in the most poshest of malls let alone street shops.
... you pay over 800 Rs. to watch Avatar in IMAX 3D, the theatre o'course still being not upto Indian standards.
... you have the biggest football game in Qatar history in 2-3 weeks and still the authorities are clueless about everything starting from tickets.
... you are stopped from entering malls and restaurants on a friday stating reason as family day ( we all know the truth ).
... you find a snail going past your car, yup.
... you hear echos of Allah O Akbar countless times a day.
... only off days on your calendar are the Qatar National Day and the 2 Eids. 
... you feel like a prisoner, getting your finger printing done.
... you feel like you are on a month long vacation during the Ramadan fasting.
... you see people carrying bakri's in back of their cars ( Halaal much ).
... you need to make 4-5 rounds before you get through to a decent enough doctor for minor problems.
... you need to loosen your pockets before jumping a red light or not wearing seat belt ( 10,000 QR O_O )
... you never hear about green technology (Energy Conservation, what is that).
... you see driving lessons being doled out in PORSCHE.
... you get your "arse-kicked" by Qatari younglings, arrogance much.
... you get to spend most boring of the diwalis and holis ever :(
... you have to bank on online community and forums for credible information rather than official websites.
... you struggle to see swimsuits and bikinis even on the beaches.
... streets are void of people and loaded with sedans and SUVs
... you see decent quality labour camps, unlike the general conceptions.
... you turn on the shower and feel like the water is coming directly from some hot spring.
... polygamy is practiced to get up the status ladder (Ok, i might have cooked this up).
... you feel safe. ( Crimes are non - existent, except for a little oppression and discrimination).
... begging is a crime.
... you could find yourself in jail for eating in public during ramadan fasting hours.
... you can stroll inside a mall built in the famous Las Vegas Venetian style.
... you find the Lamborgs, the Mercs, the Bentleys, the BMWs, the Jaguars, the Rovers, the Cadillacs, the Bugattis, the Audis, the Alfa Romeos, the Koenigsegg, the Porsche, the Rolls Roycs, the Hummers, the Suzukis, the Ducatis, the Harley Davidson, cruising past ya on the street.
... you see construction equipment roadside instead of trees.
... you see sewage trucks sucking shit out of holes, literally.
... you see fancy currency with a translucent film/plastic binding 2 pieces of paper and coins, what are those.
... you need to get a license for liquor.
... you get to dance with countless number of filipinos in the most famous of discs, bars (probably on payroll).
... even a Brasil vs England friendly football match feels like a carnival.

 and lastly,
... you get to shake hands with the Picasso of India.

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